Sunday, February 2, 2014

Love Bomb Weekend...

There's been a lot of loving around here this weekend!  It started on Friday when I picked Brian up from school and told him he was getting "Love Bombed!"  (For anyone new who is wondering what "Love Bombing" is - I posted an explanation at the bottom of this entry)

He had a special lunch... we enjoyed a rousing game of "Hungry Hungry Hippos"... and then Granny came over.  Brian probably would have been happy if that was it - but we had bigger plans!  He flipped when I told him that we were all going to the movie theater to see Frozen!  
Brian and I saw it before, but he remains obsessed with the movie and has wanted to see it again.  He was so happy that Granny would be seeing it for the first time... and that this would be Hope's first movie!
We all shared pretzel bites while sweet Hope slept through the entire experience.  I'm pretty sure Brian and I would see that movie twenty more times - we love it!!  And hearing that it's going to Broadway made me SO happy.  I can't wait to take Brian and Hope to their first Broadway show.
After the movie we headed to Target - or, as Brian likes to call it,  "The Circle Store."  Brian's friend, Timmy, has this giant Darth Vader that Brian has been coveting.  When I saw that it had gone on clearance I thought it would be the perfect Love Bomb day surprise.  I was right...
Darth Vader is so big he needs his own room - but what do I care.  We've already had a lot of fun with it!!

Everyone has their opinions about who Hope looks like - including us.  To be honest, we think she's a beautiful combination of everyone.  But most people think she looks just like Brian - so I thought I would do a "side by side" comparison.
I wish I could find a great shot of Gavin at two months so you can see how much she looks like him, too.  Unfortunately, Gavin was hospitalized with RSV and Botulism at two months and most of his photos are when he was very sick.  Gavin and I spent close to three months living at DuPont while he recovered.

Hope turned NINE weeks on Saturday!  I stop doing weekly photos with the sign once we hit the two month mark and just do monthly pictures... but I still document the day!

It's so much easier to get smiles out of her lately.  She's very responsive to faces and toys and has even started cooing a lot!  
This little toy by Lamaze is a favorite right now and always gets a cute smile!
Ed took Brian out for a SECOND Love Bomb day - just the two of them - and had a great time.  Brian wanted to go to "Arnold's Family Fun Center" - a favorite place of his (and Gavin's).  He and Ed share a love of video games and carnival type games so they had a ball.  Meanwhile, Hope and I hung out together at home and the two of us actually took about a two hour nap!  Hope was worn out after playing with her friends from "the gym."
Today was our lazy, lazy day.  How lazy?  Well, Ed snuck out of the bedroom to get Brian downstairs and let me and Hope sleep in until almost 10am!!!  I came downstairs to Brian still in his pajamas because he had declared it "pajama and movie day."  Sounds good to me!  I got out of one pair of pajamas to shower and put on another pair of pajamas.  It was a beautiful day.

This afternoon I gave Brian a psychedelic bath.  I covered up our window - turned off the lights - and dropped a super cool new bath toy we got into the tub.  It's called "Party in the Tub" and I SO wish I had seen this when Gavin was alive. He would have LOVED this so much.  
We had a lot of fun making shadows and watching the "light show" change the water different colors.
Before we knew it - it was time for our big Superbowl Party!!  Just kidding - we don't watch football.  But we do like fun food!  Daddy and Brian made chocolate pudding together which was a big treat.
I'm hoping this is just the beginning of his training and soon he'll be cooking like his Daddy.  Ed can't wait to teach his kids to cook.

Last week I mentioned that I was going to share a piece of advice that I got from some readers that I took - and that actually changed my life - but I forgot!  I promise I will write about it tomorrow.  It's pretty wild, so prepare yourself!!  Ha ha!

*** Love Bombing.  Brian had a speech delay and would have a hard time communicating his feelings or thoughts with words.  It would come out in behaviors sometimes. Brian didn't act out very often - but when he did, I suspected that he needed one on one time... not punishment.  At that time, Gavin got a lot of the attention with therapy and feeding and needing us for most everything.  I try to be aware of my children's emotions and respond to them, so I started taking both boys out on "dates." I soon found out that my theory (smothering them with love instead of constant punishment for behaviors) was actually a "thing!"  A reader from Switzerland wrote to tell me about a book by Oliver James called, "Love Bombing Children."  It's not about not disciplining children - it's about staying in tune with them and their needs.  Children can't vocalize if they are feeling lonely or sad or neglected or frustrated, etc when they're so little - or nonverbal.  It often comes out in behaviors.  Random days that are focused on them - days where the answer is "yes" (within reason, of course!) to all of their requests or questions - days when you bomb them with love - make a huge difference in behaviors.  And... quite honestly... it's very beneficial for the parent, too.  Our love bomb days happen about once a month (sometimes more!).  It's not always about buying things - sometimes our days are really simple.  Try it with your kids!  And if you do, let everyone know how it goes on the Chasing Rainbows facebook page!***



7 comments:

  1. Where did you get the tub toy? My son would love it! We put glow sticks in the tub now.

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  2. Have you read the book "Yes Day!" by Amy Krause Rosenthal? Great book….a lot like a Love Bombing day. I think you and Brian would enjoy it!

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  3. I have to tell you that everytime I see pictures of Hope I get baby fever. If I wasn't almost forty and have to have ivf again. I would have another baby. She is just too beautiful. My oldest started calling target the circle store when she was three. How funny is that.

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  4. Everytime I see Hope, I see Gavin and get chills. He's there, in her eyes. But you're right, when you look at HER she really is a true mixture so far.

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  5. I just discovered your blog and am so grateful for your willingness to share your family's story. My husband and I have three children and our two sons suffer from Progeria. After years of infertility, adoption of our daughter and then the dx of our boys I have gone through so many similar feelings "what did I do wrong? How can so much stuff happen to one person?" Thank you for sharing. I'm off to read some more! My blog is at www.libbynathanandbennett.com and we are also in the Philly area.

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  6. Hope is so cute! Happy for Brian, looks like Darth Vader will be a great edition to the family.

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  7. I was supposed to take my son to a specialist appointment today, but weather/treacherous roads this morning required we reschedule. I could have sent him to school but instead decided to make it a 'love bomb' day for him, inspired by yours! Thanks! And an even bigger thanks from my son!!

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