Friday, December 13, 2013

We'll Keep Telling Stories...

Every day, we tell stories at our house.  
I write our stories here - the good, the bad, the flattering, the unflattering.  I write our stories to keep a record...for me and for Ed and for our children.  I don't want to forget these moments that make up our lives.
Brian tells stories, too.  Every day he whispers something new to his little sister.  
Sometimes it's about Star Wars...or, like yesterday, it's about special ornaments - each with their own stories - and the new angel on the top of the tree.
But most of the time, it's about Gavin.  Every day he tells Hope - "Gavin died."  Or, he'll say, "Gavin died...but that's okay.  You have me."
And one day, when Hope is older, she will tell us her own stories...she'll have her own special ornaments, her own memories of her brother.  And hopefully, she'll remember that her special angel brother loves her from afar... but is just a whisper away.
Yesterday Brian had his school friend, Daniel, over for the afternoon.  His mother, our neighbor Sonia, drove Brian to and from school all this week to help me out.  So yesterday, when she dropped Brian off - Daniel stayed!  The boys had SO much fun together and I loved hearing Brian laugh so much with a buddy.  They played together so well and hardly needed any intervention or input from me at all!
At times it made me wistful - having another little boy around reminded me how much I miss seeing Gavin and Brian interact.  And it gave me a deeper appreciation for Brian's great loss.
I loved watching these two silly boys play and make up games and argue over who's turn it was to do everything and negotiate snacks - all of it.  The two of them made me laugh as much as they made each other laugh.
I'm so glad that Brian has made friends in his new school... and has come out of his shell socially.  It makes me happy to see him happy.  We will definitely be having more playdates in Brian's future!!  
And along the way, we'll keep telling our stories.  For everyone and no one in particular... but mainly for us.  Each and every one of us.  The story of our family - as individuals and as a unit - has its ups and downs, tragedies and triumphs, heartbreak and joy.  But my favorite part of our family story?  It's ours.  We know who we are... we know why we make the choices we make... we know the stories behind the stories.  And no one - ever - can take that away.

p.s.... Hope had her weight check this morning and lost an ounce.  Not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but it did put an ounce of worry in my head!  We'll be upping our breastfeeding game this weekend to prep for Tuesday morning's next weight check!!




10 comments:

  1. I'll be praying for a big weight increase! My little girl (3mo)has been struggling to put on weight, so I know how tough it is! Breastfeeding is such a blessing yet it does come with its challenges, too.
    You're doing great. I love hearing about your little family. God's peace!
    -Another Kate

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  2. Thank you for your stories Kate, they are greatly appreciated and anticipated :)

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  3. I hope you print all these posts out and put them in an album or make a book out of them for the kids and future grandkids. What a great piece of family history(?) for them to read

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  4. What an awesome big brother! You have some pretty cool kids there. Hope is a very lucky little girl!

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  5. And suddenly Brian looks little again! :)

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  6. I will read as long as you write. I feel like I have a stake lol. And I love the comment about Brian looking little again. He is so big next to Hope ♥♥♥ Love, Diana Pratt

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  7. Kate ur family is a blessing..Brain is a great brother to Hope as they grow together Hope will now Gavin very well...God bless your whole family Kate..Happy Holidays to all..

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  8. Kate, the angel is perfect and your tree is gorgeous! I am so glad you gind the positive in all situations. You and your story are an inspiration. Merry Christmas!

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  9. I just read your post on FB and wanted to write a quick note here to tell you how sorry I am that the world is full of hateful people. And I'm sorry that one or more of them have written to you and have said hateful things to you. I think you are a wonderful mother and a wonderful person. You have gone through more things in your life than most people will ever go through, and you have done it with grace and courage! And, you are an inspiration in my daily life. If I am having a tough day, I just think about you and what you have gone through and I think that what I am going through just isn't that bad. So, please keep writing and letting us catch a glimpse of you and your precious family. It is a highlight of my day and I look forward to your posts! Hugs to you Kate!

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  10. I love those pictures by the christmas tree!

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