Saturday, September 14, 2013

It's All About Brian!...

Yesterday marked the end of Brian's first full week of Pre-K.  I'm so happy (and relieved - but not surprised) that he loves his new school.  He adapted to the change easily and has already taken to the new routines.  His teacher, Miss Kristen, gave this paper to every child to fill out so they could all get to know each other.  Brian and I had a lot of fun filling it out!!  To give you an idea just how much he loves his new school... a little girl in his class named Emily AND the school secretary, Miss Suzie, made his "Friends List!"  (Our little ladies man)
I let Brian decide what family photo to use for this part.  I would have respected any choice - but I couldn't make his real wish come true.  He wanted a photo with Gavin AND Hope in it.
After school, Brian and I stopped by the Just Between Friend's consignment sale to pick up...wait for it...a SKELETON COSTUME!!!  The one thing I couldn't find at the sale when I was there!  A friend saw it and called me right away and we ran right over.  Brian loved it - and for $7.00, so did I!  He really wants to be a skeleton for Halloween.  At least for now.

After we tucked the skeleton safely in the car, we headed to our local "Bounce-U" to celebrate the successful end of his first week!
We had a lot of fun.  Brian is such a happy kid - we really are so lucky.
Lately, Brian has been mentioning Gavin a lot more in casual conversation.  Like...

"I wish Gavin was here to see these big bubbles.  He loved bubbles.  But that's okay, Mama, don't worry.  He died but we can still think about him and pretend he's here."

We talk about Gavin all the time - reliving memories, looking at pictures, imagining what we'd be doing if he were still here and telling the story about the day he died... still a nightly ritual that Brian requests.  You would think that this might be very painful for us - the constant reliving and retelling and remembering.  But I actually think little Brian is helping us heal... one memory, one picture, one "pretending" at a time.

Brian is a wise little boy.


  1. Watching the evolution of his perspective is a beautiful thing. I remember -- is that the right word for a voyeur who is watching your family from the internet through your blog? -- when he asked you for Gavin and it broke your heart that you couldn't provide him. You've given your little guy a way to manage his grief and learn about loss while still living a joyful life. Well done.

  2. Love that Brian, so young but so wise, just like his big brother :)

  3. My son got that same poster to fill out from his new school this year too! So glad Brian had a good first week at his new school!

  4. Kate - It is just beautiful to see how you let Brian have his own voice. Your grief has to be just overwhelming at times, yet you always seem to let Brian have his voice. I can't even imagine how incredibly difficult that has to be or how rewarding. I will pray your continued good health and for the continued strength of you and Ed. So glad Brian had a great first week of school.


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