Saturday, May 11, 2013

On Mother's Day...

On this Mother's Day, my heart is with my Mom.
The reason that I aspired to be a Mother in the first place.  Truly.  It's all I ever wanted to be - but only if I could be like her.
I'm still trying.

Only one year and six months ago, my Dad died.  It was a great loss for my Mother... and for all of us.
Then, just this past March, she sold the family home.  It had been her home for forty seven years.
She had just moved into her new home - a lovely retirement community - just a week before my birthday.
At a time when she should be sitting back, making new friends, getting adjusted to her new home...
...she is grieving.  Again.  This is not lost on me.
Now that I'm a Mother, I realize the intense pain felt when one of your children is hurting.  My Mother, who means everything to me, is still trying to cope with her husband's death... then a major life change with a move... then her grandson's tragic death... and finally, watching her own daughter grieve.

Again.
On this Mother's Day, my heart is with my Mother.  
We have always been tightly connected by our own invisible string.  

And even though I can't imagine her grief... and she can't imagine mine...
...our bond means that we don't need words.  We never did.  We just knew.  I hope that Gavin knew.  And I hope that Brian will always "just know" like I always did...
 ...on Mother's Day.
And every day.





24 comments:

  1. I've done many things in my life I'm proud of, but being a Mom, made my life complete. Few mothers EVER think they were good enough, happy enough, baked enough, loved enough, played enough, etc. But I have tell myself everyday that it IS enough. What YOU have done, do and will continue to do is "enough", it's very hard for you to see from your position, but trust each and every reader, because we can see & its enough.

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  2. I have buried my mother and my second son and what gives me the strength to get through another day is my first born, his love for a little brother he never got to see and the fact that my mom will be more than happy to take care of her second grandson until such time as I am able to see him face to face. Until that time comes I am content that they are together with our ancestors and watching over us.... I feel your pain, and I know how profound it is but please take comfort in that day when you can once again hold each other in your arms and again feel your spirit become whole... May God grant you peace and deliver you to everlasting communion with your little one

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  3. Kate, the last picture of you and your mother looks like you and Gavin! What a treasure! Happy Mother's Day to you and your precious Mom....

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    1. I thought the same thing!!!!
      That was a beautiful post - your mother is blessed to have you for a daughter.

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  4. Tears. Many tears. It's so true that you don't realize just how much it hurts until them until you have your own. My most heartfelt mothers day wishes to you both. You are a fantastic mom, and it shows that YOU had a fantastic mom to learn from. I wish you peace tomorrow.

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  5. What a beautiful post, you and your mom are both amazing and strong. Will think of you both, and Gavin and your families tomorrow.

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  6. What a beautiful tribute to your mom.

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  7. You can tell she is just as lovely as you.

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  8. Your words--so touching. Your heart--so amazing. Thank you for opening your world to us.

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  9. Thinking of you and your family on this mother's day!

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  10. Wishing you hope and peace on this Mother's Day. The last picture reminds me of you and Gavin. You can feel the love between you and your mom~nothing like the love between mother and child. God Bless you and your family.

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  11. Happy Mother's Day Kate! To an amazing mom of two super hero boys and a super hero herself. Wishing you a great day today and always!

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  12. Beautifully said. And I agree. I always wanted to be like my mom. Happy Mother's Day Kate to you, your mom and all the mom's!

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  13. Your grace and strength astound me. What a beautiful reflection of love in honor of your mother as you struggle with your own loss. It amazes me that as you are dealing with the unimaginable today you are still able to see the loss your mother is experiencing and feel her pain too. You are truly one of the most inspiring people I unfortunately have never had the pleasure of meeting. Thank you for sharing your story. wishing you strength, peace and love today!

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  14. Happy Mothers Day! You are an amazing mother, one for others to look up to and inspire others to be as good as you. :)

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  15. Have a blessed and happy Mother's Day, Kate! You continue to hope and inspire me -- I want to be Kate when I grow up! :-)

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  16. My heart aches for you and your mother. I know that today will be so painful and I want you to know that I care. Praying for your comfort today and always. May God hold you close. ((HUGS))

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  17. (((Hugs))) + Love from Switzerland

    Sol E.

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  18. Your children know, Kate. They know. Because you are their mom. Because your spirit shines through. Because you model that knowing. Because...

    The tribute to you is in Gavin's warm smile, and in Brian's beaming grin and his well-thoughtout answers to the All About Mom questions...

    Hugs and healing, Kate...

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  19. Mother's love is:
    "Love is long‐suffering and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

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  20. Your mom has a great smile. Her light is clearly "on".

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  21. That was an amazing tribute to your mom and yourself. You put into words such beauty. Thank you.

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