Brian and I were up together much of the night last night. He was burning up with a fever and, like most of us when we're sick, he wanted his Mommy. I can't believe that I am finally "The Mommy" who holds the magic that makes everything better. How can I have the magic when I still want my OWN Mommy when I'm sick? Not sure how that works...
I kept him home from school and then spent much of the morning checking on him to be sure he was okay because he slept until 10:15!! The rest of the morning he snuggled up in the bean bag with his blanket, his drinks and alternating between books and TV shows.
At one point, the two of us were drawing at the art table. My Mom gave Brian and Gavin a huge box of papers, markers, crayons and paints from "Granny's Basement" recently. She didn't realize that a felt tip pen had made its way into the box. My Dad always used felt tip pens. So, imagine my surprise when Brian pulled the felt tip out of the box and said, "Oh, this is Pop's pen!"
What did you say?
"This is Pop's pen. He likes these pens a lot. They're his favorite."
Later, I called my Mom. I asked her if she told Brian that my Dad used felt tips. She didn't. And I didn't. And Ed doesn't know that my Dad used felt tips.
So, who told him?
This is not the first time that Brian has mentioned my Dad. And when Gavin was a baby, Ed and I swore that he saw people. Gavin rarely - and I mean RARELY - laughed. But we would lay him on his changing table and he would look up at a plain white ceiling with no shadows or lights... and he would laugh. Belly laugh. One of my favorite Uncles had passed away that year, my Uncle Bernie - my Dad's brother, and he was always making people laugh. To this day, I believe that my Uncle Bernie brought joy to Gavin during a stressful and pain filled infancy.
Ed and I believe that it's possible to "hear from" our loved ones. I see signs all the time - like personal jokes between my Dad and me - that make me feel close to him every day. And we have both had sessions with a "Medium" (AND we saw Teresa Caputo from Long Island Medium when she was on tour!) that blew our minds.
Just today I happened upon something that one of my Facebook friends commented on. I don't know what made me click to see what it was - because I never do that with other people's comments and likes. But I did - and was shocked at what I saw. Her father had posted the entire poem, "Annabel Lee" and remarked that it was his favorite poem. Well, this was MY Dad's favorite poem, too. He knew it by heart and would often recite it. In that moment, I felt like I had received a love letter from Heaven from my Dad.
Whether it's all really true or not - who cares? If it brings comfort to the people left behind to see their loved ones in signs and messages, who cares? These types of things don't scare me one bit. As a matter of fact, they bring me great comfort. I feel just as close to my Dad today as I did when he was alive. I really do. And I know, without a doubt, that my Dad and Ed's parents are watching everything... and holding all of the babies we lost in their arms.
Last night I created a Facebook page for this blog. You could call it Gavin and Brian's fan page, if you like! Instead of using my personal Facebook page, I will be posting the links to my journal entries when I write them on this new page. But it's also a place where we can share experiences. I encourage you to head over there tonight - and, if you have any stories to tell about messages from YOUR loved ones that have passed away, I would LOVE to hear them. No judgements are allowed on this Facebook page - it's all love there. So, share with us!
You can find the page here: