I think every parent secretly (or not so secretly if you're me) fears that they'll somehow screw up their kids. I mean, really - there are no qualifications to raise little people. No manual. No tutors. Nothing. At any moment - on any given day - I could say or do something that will psychologically scar them for life. Land them in therapy before they are out of diapers.
What's that? Are they both still in diapers? Why yes, they are.
See what I mean?!? I'm TOTALLY SCREWING THEM UP!!!!!
But the one thing I worry about more than anything? Gavin and Brian's relationship - on many, many levels. I worry about Gavin feeling left out.
I worry about Brian feeling resentful. I worry about Gavin getting hurt (unintentionally) when Brian wants to "play" with him.
I worry that my correcting Brian for "playing" will send him the wrong message. I worry about my worrying. This will be what lands me on "the couch" - mark my words.
Lately Brian has changed in some ways with how he treats his big brother. He's still sweet and helpful - wanting to wipe his drool and hand him toys. But he also is starting to think it's funny to take toys away from Gavin. Gavin is changing, too. He used to just move on and find a new toy - but now he's starting to object and cry when Brian does this.
It freaks me OUT.
Also, Brian wants to play a little too rough with Gavin sometimes. He'll try to pick him up when he's standing holding onto something...or he'll roll onto him when they're both laying on the floor.
That freaks me out, too.
Sibling rivalry is one thing. And brothers wrestling is another thing. This is different. I have a legitimate concern that Brian will unintentionally hurt Gavin. And I worry that me continuously correcting Brian and saying the wrong thing (like - "You have to be careful, you're stronger than him!") will create resentment...or confusion...or paranoia...or insert any other "worryish" word here.
I know that Brian will likely grow up to be a compassionate and caring man because of his experience with his special needs brother. But I'm hoping that I don't inadvertently introduce my neuroses into his little head along the way.
Is anyone out there in my boat? How do you handle the relationships between your typical and your superhero children? Do you have these fears, too?