Tuesday, January 31, 2012

And So It Goes...

Well, I tried. I tried to keep Brian quarantined as much as possible. Unfortunately, the inevitable happened. I am sick. Ed is sick. And Gavin is on his way. How do I know this? He took a nap today - a pretty lengthy one. That never happens anymore.

It hit me last night - the congestion, the cough and the sore throat. I laid awake much of the night because I felt crappy...and because I was worried. I was so, so worried that my egg retrieval would be canceled due to illness. I didn't know how the anesthesiologist would feel with me having congestion. As soon as they opened I had them on the phone - and was so relieved. Everything is still a "go" for tomorrow's procedure.

The boys and I lounged all day. Literally. (I told Miss Sara to stay away today - no one needs to see Zombie Kate in her pajamas and bed hair all day) We did a lot of nothing - including eating. Neither of them had much of an appetite. Ed stayed up late last night and made his famous Split Pea Soup so I'd have something to eat today and during my recovery...which was so sweet of him. There's nothing better than comforting soup made with love.

Tonight it will be early to bed...and tomorrow I'll be up before the sun. I'm very excited for this egg retrieval and am hoping and praying for the quality and quantity of the eggs to be excellent! My recovery last time around was pretty tough - I had to sleep sitting up for days and had a lot of tenderness and pain. Hopefully this time will be easier...especially now that I'm sick on top of it all!

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we step into this terrifying and exciting IVF cycle again!

Monday, January 30, 2012

Turning Point...

Last night I went into Brian's room to check on him. I found him laying on his back, his hands under his head, staring at the ceiling. Then his eyes slowly turned my way and just blankly stared into mine. Something was up. As my hand went down to touch him, the heat from his little body radiated into my palms before I even made contact. I picked him up to take him into the bathroom so I could take his temperature and give him some medicine...and he threw up all over. His temperature (after three different tests with three separate thermometers because I refused to believe each one) was 103.7. We called the doctor...again.

As soon as Ed heard the temperature he was packing our bags for the hospital. I admit - 103.7 is high. And our little Brian is very rarely sick to begin with. But for some reason - this time - I didn't panic. When the doctor called back, he said not to worry about the fever. That high fevers don't always bother kids. If it was combined with other symptoms there might be a concern - but he was happy to hear that Brian was breathing, talking, smiling and asking for milk. We gave him a Tylenol suppository and I brought him into my bed so we could watch this week's episode of "Real Housewives of Atlanta". I could say that I recently read a study that showed one episode of ANY of the Real Housewives is enough to scare anything out of anybody and I thought it may cure Brian of what ails him. But the truth is, I was just being a lazy Mom. He snuggled up next to me against my shoulder and soon his temperature was back to normal. (Please don't report me for the Real Housewives thing? We're all friends here.)

This may sound silly, but I saw last night as a turning point. For me. As a Mom. We were conditioned for so long (and in some part we still are with Gavin!) that every little thing was a big thing. Ever illness resulted in a hospital stay. Every hospital stay meant Gavin rose to the top of a thousand people's prayer chains. Every little thing was never little. So I don't blame Ed for warming up the car as soon as the thermometer beeped. But I patted myself on the back for not going there myself. For the first time in my Mommy history - I was calm. And I didn't go to that dark place that my mind typically races to.

Today has been a light day. We've been letting Brian watch Sesame Street in an effort to keep him occupied and away from Gavin. But I think we might be too late. Gavin has had a case of the crankies today and I worry that he might be coming down with this cold. Needless to say, there will be no school and no therapy for much - if any - of this week. What a drag.

We are on the road to our egg retrieval! I just got the call with my instructions to be at the doctor's office at 7:45am THIS WEDNESDAY! (A very huge, huge thank you to Miss Sara for getting here early and staying until Ed gets home from work on that day so I can recover!) This morning when I went in for my ultrasound, this is what we saw...

Eight follicles in my right ovary!

Eight follicles in my left ovary!

This doesn't mean that all sixteen will be suitable...some won't even release eggs. But it DOES mean that I'm walking a little bow legged - these suckers are big! And heavy!

Let's hope that the new cocktail of stimulation medications I was on...plus the Acupuncture I've been doing...plus all of your prayers...plus my many angels pulling for me in Heaven will help me to conceive this time around. And then let's pray that this baby sticks around to meet us.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Full Moon Weekend...

It has been quite a weekend. Can someone tell me if there has been a full moon? It sure feels like it!! Where to begin...

Saturday morning I noticed Brian started coughing randomly here and there. My radar went off, but not too strongly. We were at the local YMCA taking a tour - considering membership - so I was distracted. (We did end up joining!)

When we got home, he had lunch - a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. A few weeks ago I bravely crossed over and tried to overcome my irrational peanut butter fear. Both boys have been tested for peanut allergies not that long ago and both were negative. Brian has had peanut butter at least six times - and no reactions. So I nearly freaked out...okay, I totally freaked out...when I looked over at him Saturday and his face and neck were filled with HIVES! I did what any normal, intelligent Mother would do. I posted it on Facebook. I had lots of "Facebook Doctors" telling me everything from "it's probably a virus" to "it's a peanut allergy" to "chickenpox!" to "fifths disease" to "the plague!" Okay, nobody really said the plague...but the comments scared me more than Googling would have. I was very happy when the doctor finally called and said...it's likely a virus. I put him in a baking soda bath and the hives went away.

Brian went down for a nap - unfortunately, it was Benadryl induced because of the hives - and Gavin and I left for our date. I was looking forward to an expo at a school down the road. It had advertised that many of the vendors would be "special needs camps"...but I still wanted to go to see if I could learn anything. And...I wanted to check out this school to see if it would be appropriate for Gavin.

We walked in...and that's when things went nuts. Gavin is usually a calm, cool, collected "date" when we go out.

But not today - when I was wanting to talk to a whole bunch of people...take things in...concentrate a little bit. He was throwing himself around in his stroller. He was banging his head against the back seat. He was sobbing. Then...when I picked him up to hold him (mind you - this is all within the first ten minutes of being there!) he would throw himself back into a backbend forcing me to lift his heavy body back up...only for him to do it again. And again. Insert sobbing. And repeat. It was a very frustrating experience. Something was just "too much" for him in there. Maybe the noise? Maybe the people? Or maybe, as his Aunt Bean so wisely pointed out, it was that he really doesn't want to go to school!!!

While I was there, I was able to pick up a few useful things. I discovered that this "school" was really a therapy center for kids like Gavin. All private pay therapy for children who don't have therapy covered like we do. I also found out that there is a horse farm that is right down the street from Brian's school (very close to our house!) that does therapeutic horseback riding. Gavin did so well with this in the past and I'd love to do it again. The farm that we took him to before is quite a hike from our house...which makes it tough now with Brian in school. It was a three or more hour chunk out of my day with Gavin. I plan to visit this farm close by for a tour someday soon.

I also was able to talk to my sister's friend - she happened to be manning a table that was for the Parent Education Network. PEN is committed to offering help, resources and more to parents of kids with special needs. Unfortunately, while chatting with her Gavin was at his worst and I quickly had to leave. But if I got one great thing from our short conversation...it was the term "Least Restrictive Environment." I feel lucky that I have known my sister's friend for more than half of my life and can contact her anytime...and the website is wonderful and filled with resources. But that "Least Restrictive Environment" term kept running through my mind as we drove home. It says, in part...

Discussions should focus on supplementary aids and services needed to help your child benefit from educational services.

I admit - this whole "special education" world is new to me. I need to learn a lot - and it's overwhelming. I have this idea that Gavin could go to school with Sara...for a morning program just like Brian.

There, he could safely navigate the classroom and the toys with Sara's help. He could be let out of a restrictive chair to be in his walker and Sara could be a one-on-one help to him. If he started to act up with any inappropriate mouthing behavior (like banging his teeth on something), Sara could distract him...move him...stop him...without resorting to strapping him back into a restrictive chair. Then...he could come home at lunchtime and his therapists (if they didn't see him at school) could come to the house for his therapy! It sounds so simple to me. And it would take the burden off overworked teachers who just can't be one-on-one with every child. I hope my dream for Gavin can become a reality. (And by hope, please know that I mean...I KNOW my dream for Gavin WILL become a reality. I just didn't want to appear too pompous. *wink*)

Gavin will likely start Kindergarten by his fifth birthday. They changed the cut off date from "the child has to be five by September 1st" (which Gavin would not have been five yet) to "the child has to be five by September 30th" (which is ONE DAY after Gavin's birthday). I can't keep him home forever - and if I choose NOT to send him to Kindergarten, we would have to privately pay for ALL of his therapy services I've been told. But I don't know ALL the gory details yet. I will be attending a meeting in a few weeks to get more information. I've given myself permission to NOT panic until after that meeting.

I was happy to see Saturday end. Between Brian's hives...Gavin's meltdown...and a stressful evening, I was happy to crawl under the covers ridiculously early which is why I skipped the blog. I slept well...

Only to wake up to a very sick Brian.

Ed was convinced this morning that Brian had Whooping cough. His cough was pretty nasty and his voice was as deep as the ocean. Fortunately, he was happy and playing and eating here and there so I wasn't super worried. And the second call of the weekend from the pediatrician calmed me down even more. He really thought it was a virus - that it was unlikely that it was Whooping cough (thank God!). I'm keeping him home from school, obviously, and canceling Gavin's therapy for now. And I'm also praying - HARD - that the rest of us don't get sick. Gavin can never afford to get sick - I really don't like when he misses his therapy! And this week Ed and I will be going in for our egg retrieval for IVF...followed five or six days later by the embryo transfer. I want to be in tip top "baby growing" shape for all of it!

If there was one good thing about the weekend, it was the time I got to spend with Gavin today. While poor Brian slept this afternoon, Gavin and I played. Just the two of us. It brought back memories from the time that it WAS just us. I took a crazy amount of photos of him today...but had to share these three. It makes me so happy when Gavin deliberately plays "peek a boo". He pulls the cloth over his face...and after I ask "Where's Gavin? Has anyone seen Gavin?" he slowly pulls it off his face and flashes the biggest smile.

It may seem small. But I assure you - it's SO huge.
He is...amazing.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Mommy Hangs The Moon...

Ok, before I begin - let's get one thing straight. I...and only I...hang the moon for my sons. Future girlfriends and wives beware. Because I literally hang the moon. Okay - moving on, for now.

Miss Sara, the boys and I had such an interesting morning. I scheduled a tour of a local pre-school called "Charlestown Playhouse." I invite you to click on the link and check it out...it's a very different type of pre-school. Their philosophy is that children learn through play so there isn't a rigid structure to their school days. It almost seemed "Montessori-like" to me, so I wanted to check it out.

We had a lovely tour of the entire facility - Brian got to play in each of the classrooms and Gavin was taking everything in as well. I wanted to cry when they said that they would be willing to accommodate any type of scenario we wanted for Gavin - with a full time helper, with a walker, with a wheelchair, without any equipment. They would be sure he could enjoy everything.

I would have been sold on just that.


Isn't there always a but? Both Miss Sara and I left there feeling a little jumpy...a little chaotic inside...and both of us had headaches. It, to us, was kind of a "free for all" in that school. The children were able to run and scream and do what they wanted. I am not at all judging this type of school...or the type of curriculum...or the philosophy. Not one bit. I just know my kids...and the way they are is all my fault.

We like structure.

We're not big fans of chaos. We like order and routine.

And Gavin...well, he likes the quiet. So we said a "No, thank you!" to Charlestown Playhouse. But now I'm on a mission. I told Miss Sara that we're going on a world tour of pre-school/kindergartens until we find the perfect one. Tomorrow, Gavin and I will be attending an expo at a local school. I'm not exactly sure what to expect - the flyer was vague. But I do know that it's right down the road - and it's quite possible that I may pick up some information that might help me learn something new about schools in the area. Gavin and I are very excited!

We are in the process of rearranging our boys living spaces. Brian is going into Gavin's original room...and Gavin might go into Brian's current room (if we get pregnant, that is). Well, current until tonight. Yesterday the painting was finished in Brian's new room...and tonight we moved all of his furniture into his brand new room!!

I kept the colors the same as Gavin's original nursery - because I love it so much.

Brian helped Ed take his bed apart so we could move it...

And then helped him screw it back together (literally, he did!) once we moved it next door...


We haven't yet decided how we will decorate this room. Robots? Space? Birds? All of these are Brian's favorite things so it's such a tough decision!

I'm super proud at how easily Brian adapted to going to sleep in a brand new, undecorated room tonight. He was a little upset that I hadn't hung his moon. For Christmas we got him a "Moon in My Room" which is just about the coolest thing ever. Each night we look out his window before bed and check the current status of the moon (if we can see it!). Then we mimic the outside moon in his room! Brian LOVES this - as he loves everything planets and space. As soon as we went into his new room tonight - the moon was the first thing on his mind....

{Big thanks to our good friends, Kort and Alison, for the great train table they gave us (the trains aren't on it yet, clearly!) which we chose to use in Brian's cool new room!}

So...let it be known. To all the future ladies in my son's life. I...and only I...hang his moon. Got it? (I am going to be the world's WORST mother in law)

He went to sleep so happy - with the moon on his night table for now...

And stars illuminating his bedroom "sky".

Life is good when you're Brian Leong.
Actually, life is good if you're a Leong. Period.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Keep The Faith...

I have a confession. I am pretty sure that I'm really sad.

I could blame it on my Dad. He'd be okay with that. I'm so mad that he's gone. I can't say that I had unfinished business with him. Fortunately, that wouldn't be accurate. I talked to him a lot - and I shared a lot with him - and he always knew the right answers to all of my wrong questions.

I miss him so much I can't stand it. I'm also kind of bummed that I haven't "heard from him" which I realize may sound absurd. I guess I was looking for some dramatic sign - or lights flickering (it is possible that I've watched too much "Ghost Whisperer") - or a very realistic dream...or something. Nope. Nothing.

But on a positive note (which I learned from my Dad) - today there may have been a sign. At my first fertility appointment after starting my stimulation injections they did an ultrasound to check on my egg production. (We could be going in for our egg retrieval as early as this Wednesday, February 1st!) The nurse and I got to talking. She didn't know that my Dad had died right before Christmas. She didn't know that I found out I was pregnant after our very first try with IVF on the day that my Dad had his stroke. She didn't know that I stayed pregnant through the hospital vigil, the terribly emotional days following his death, the days we planned his funeral, the viewing and the funeral and the burial. She didn't know about Darcy. As I told her these little pieces of my life story - she kept repeating the same thing to me.

"You have to just keep the faith."

Something my Dad always said - "Keep the faith." It was a big part of our tribute to him and was included in the eulogies, the program and more. Keep the faith. Why would a young nurse continue to repeat the phrase to me?

I would give anything to talk to my Dad right now. I'd tell him that Gavin is following Miss Stephanie's directions to push a bead across a piece of string...

How today, when our painter (Miss Katja's boyfriend, Franco!) was washing brushes after finishing Brian's new room, that Gavin was right in there watching and wanting to "help"...

That today, he was easily amused by bubbles and it was such a beautiful reminder to me to stop and enjoy the simple things in life...

How he continues to color match, amazing all of us. Look at the following photos. He knocked the blue block accidentally into the yellow square...

And then deliberately corrected himself and put the blue block into the blue square.

I'd tell him that he chomped on apple slices today with Miss Maggie and used the iPad to ask for his milk...

When I stop to think, I can't really blame ALL of my sadness on my Dad dying. Over the past four years it has been one thing after another for our family. Gavin's birth crisis...his health crisis...a traumatic first year...followed quickly by Brian's birth which was unfortunately followed by post-partum depression. My pregnancy with Darcy...her birth straight into Heaven...and multiple miscarriages throughout up until a few months ago.

I trick myself into thinking I'm not as sad as I think. I'm plenty social...if you count the conversations I have all day with therapists, Miss Sara, my children, Facebook and talking to the TV when I disagree with one of the Real Housewives of any city. But the reality is - I rarely get out. Because I talk to people every day all day - I often don't want to talk to anyone else. The truth is - I feel I really have nothing left...or nothing that important...to say.

I would love to tell my Dad how I've stuck to my guns keeping Gavin home from "school" for as long as I have. My whole philosophy - which was well thought out - was that we should work with Gavin to become more independent physically before we sent him out into the world. Even now I don't think he's ready - despite his recent progress with his walker. If I were to put him in school...the second he was let down to 'explore his environment', I know just what he'd do. He'd go up to any surface and bang his teeth - or he'd rub his mouth and tongue on their windows and other glass surfaces. And the second he did that, they would strap him into a chair to stop the behavior. There is just not enough adults for each child - in any school! At home, he can be Gavin. He has a safe and clean environment to explore and get around on his own. He can access any toy he wants - at any time. He even can climb into the open refrigerator to retrieve his own milk cup.

But now the clock is ticking. I received in the mail "Kindergarten Registration Forms" from our school district. They decided to change the cut off date, meaning that come September of this year I will not be able to receive therapy services from our county the way we do now - at home. Before they changed the date I had a whole extra year - but now I don't. At first I freaked out...but I know that by Gavin's 5th birthday (if not sooner) he will be ready. But now it's up to me to find the right school...the right scenario...the right location...to be sure it's just perfect.

My pie in the sky dream? To find a wonderful school and send Miss Sara with him. She's totally game. She knows Gavin - knows his quirks and his bad habits. She could help him access things in the classroom and discourage the mouthing behavior by keeping him distracted and entertained. If I had that - I'd send him tomorrow! And he could either get his therapy in school - or they could come here once he's home for the day. At least until next September! It, to me, seems like the perfect set up. Now...I just need to convince whoever I need to convince...and find the school that would foster the spark that we've all lit in Gavin. Just another thing on my "to do" list. Wish me luck...

I just wish I could run this by my Dad. He'd know just what to do.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Buddha Baby...

Today was a very special day - for so many reasons.

After dropping Brian off at school I came back home to collect Gavin and Miss Sara. Gavin had an appointment with his Orthopedic doctor at DuPont. He sees him every six months - just to keep an eye on his hips, his spine and his tone. I wanted to bring Miss Sara along with us for two reasons. First, I thought it would be interesting for her - she is planning on working in the health care field (public health) and I'm happy to give her as many opportunities as I can to learn something new. I also love showing off that hospital...and telling the many stories of our experiences there. This hospital holds a special place in my heart...in Ed's...and even in Gavin's. Gavin is always a happy boy when we're there.

The doctor was running behind so we took a quick trip to the chapel. Every corner of that hospital holds a memory for me and the chapel is no exception. It was on that very altar that Gavin sat up unassisted for the first time (remember that, Miss Kara?). A moment I will never forget - and one I get teary remembering as I open the chapel doors to walk in. It was also there that Ed and I brought Gavin immediately following the "Your son has cerebral palsy" diagnosis. And when I lived at that hospital for 8 weeks with an infant Gavin - we would steal away in the middle of the night to that chapel. Gavin loved looking at that stained glass.

Some things never change...

Telling the stories to Miss Sara brought so much back. It is just incredible how far Gavin has come since those harrowing days and nights at the hospital. I was glad to share more of Gavin's history - and what makes me the overprotective Mom I am - with Sara.

Once they were ready for us, we brought Gavin in for an X-Ray of his hips. There has never been a problem with his hips, but it's important that we keep an eye on them due to his Cerebral Palsy - and his low tone. The X-Ray came back fine, as expected.

We were brought back to a room and waited for the doctor. And waited. And waited. And waited some more. Sara remarked that Gavin was so patient - we had no toys, no movie and only a very grown up children's book that was in the room. I told Sara that Gavin has always been like this. He's such a patient, sweet child and rarely asks for more than a song, a cuddle or room to roll around. He really is such a joy...our "Buddha Baby".

Dr. Gabos came in and examined Gavin - checking his hips and his tone, his ankles and feet and his spine. He thought he looked great and told his assistant things like, "It's rare to see a child that had such low tone go on to do this well" and more 'he's defied the odds' type of statements that always make me stand a little taller. I'm so ridiculously proud of Gavin and all the hard work he's done over these four years. The most exciting news from our visit, though, was Gavin's WEIGHT!! He has crossed over into the thirties and now weighs in at 31lbs! I've been trying to get him out of the 20s for quite some time so I am THRILLED!!!!

If you are new to this blog and are wondering what in the world I'm talking about when I mention Gavin's infancy...you can check out my first online journal for the backstory. I started something called "CaringBridge" when we were at the hospital. It was really just to keep our family and friends informed of Gavin's condition. He was very, very sick. Once I realized how therapeutic writing was each day - I never stopped! And here I am. You can find the CaringBridge here...and if you click "journal" and then click "sort oldest to newest" it will take you back to the very beginning. Just a warning - bring tissues.

While we were at the hospital, Ed had the pleasure of picking Brian up from school! He delivered him home to a waiting Granny and the report was that they had a great time together. When we got home, Brian was asleep and we quickly fed Gavin before his speech therapist arrived.

We were so happy to see Miss Maggie who just got back from her honeymoon! Today we worked on some oral motor exercises with Gavin, using bubbles to encourage him to make a 'kissy face'. Then we used the iPad for the last half of the session.

Tomorrow is Miss Sara's birthday!! I've given her the day off to celebrate (everyone should have the day off on their birthday, don't you think?!?) But today was also the day I wanted to do her formal review. I told her yesterday to be prepared for this - that I wrote it all out and would sit down with her today. I told her I have this benchmark for myself - I like to do a review after the person has been here a month. So today was her review...

...otherwise known as "Sara Day"!!!!

And this...is her formal review. There is nothing else I could possibly add.

Happy Birthday, Miss Sara! We love you!

Monday, January 23, 2012

Don't Wanna Miss A Thing...

There's never enough time in the day. A Mother's cry for thousands of years. My cry is no different. Lately...since Brian started school...I feel like time is slipping away from me. I thought with Brian in school my biggest problems would be...missing him and figuring out what to do with those hours in between. Instead, my life has become a series of managing appointments around drop off and pick up...working with Gavin in between drop off and pick up...trying to spend some time with Gavin while Brian is gone, even though the lure of my never ending "to do" list is so strong...picking up Brian and dealing with his exuberance (a fancy word for SPAZ behavior) once he gets home...therapy appointments as usual for Gavin...and more. Miss Sara and I look at each other by the end of the day with the same look of frozen fear (wait...I think that's her look) and "wow...I can't believe this day is almost over!" with that sleepy eyed type of expression. The days are over in the blink of an eye...which makes me always fearful that I'll miss something...that they'll be grown ups before I finish putting their baby books together. I know...I'm out of control.

This morning I had my first TWO "pre-school Mommy failures". Brian was sent home with an assignment last week. His teachers sent home three small, white paper plates and asked that we send them back looking like snowmen! No problem! As I read further down it said to please return them on Monday, January 24. No problem! Brian and I worked on the snowman over the weekend here and there...but we both agreed (ha ha) that we'd save the finishing touches for Monday so we could bring it in on the 24th...which is Tuesday. Following this so far? Sunday night - with Brian fast asleep - I look at the paper again. I realize they wrote "Monday the 24th." Then I look at the calendar and realize that the 24th is Tuesday. And then I panicked. OMG...did they mean Monday? Or Tuesday?? Our snowman isn't done!!!! I could easily have done it myself...and it did occur to me...but please, this is pre-school. The whole idea is to do things with your child, right? But then I thought OMG...what if I walk in tomorrow and every one of his classmates has their snowman. So my next logical thought was, "Fine...we'll scope out all of their snowmans and make sure that OURS is BETTER when we bring it in Tuesday!" (I'm a little competitive. *wink*) But then I realized - Uh oh. I'm Kate Leong...documenter of every second of my child's life. I will be expected to provide internet proof that Brian and I made this snowman. Because it's true - we really did! Keep reading!!

Ed and I are in disagreement of the snowman's name...he thinks Brian said "Star" when asked what his name should be. I was sure he was saying "Snowflake". Clearly Speech Therapy was a good call.

So, without further (boring and rambling) adieu...I introduce you to our snowman, "Mr. Star Snowflake"

The second Mommy failure? Well - it is pretty bad. *wink* See Brian's adorable button down shirt? I didn't wash it before I had him wear it for the first time. It's something I could NEVER do with Gavin. Everything has to be washed with his special detergent before it touches his skin...he's that sensitive. But this shirt - it was so cute. And I typically NEVER buy anything that would require ironing (for ANYONE!) - but I couldn't resist this cute shirt. I wanted him to at least wear it once looking perfect before it got washed and then sat in the "to be ironed" pile which might as well be the trash can. So, what was the big 'failure', you ask? Umm....I forgot to remove the price tag. Oh, whatever - like it's never happened to you.

While Brian and I were putting the finishing touches on Star Snowflake the Snoman, Gavin was working with Miss Janna and Miss Sara! The report was that Gavin was more of a daydreamer today than a color matcher. We found that earlier he was the same way when Sara and I put him in his walker. I think he was in a Monday mood.

Immediately after Janna left, I ran to my Acupuncture appointment. It's going very well...I highly recommend this type of therapy! Not to mention, you are forced to nap. She could charge me double the price and it would be worth it for that nap!!

At the end of the day - which came too fast - I captured this adorable moment. Brian was on his iPad and Gavin pulled himself up to the table to see what he was doing. Typically Brian gets upset when Gavin touches what he's playing with...but not tonight. As Gavin stood there, Brian started speaking confidently...in some type of alien language - but confidently. It was like he was trying to explain to Gavin what he was doing. He didn't get frustrated or impatient at all with his big brother.

All of a sudden I realized that in ten blinks I will see this happen again. And they will be in high school...or adults. And in that moment I sent up a little prayer to God. Please...let them always be friends. And please let them always take care of each other - especially if we aren't around.

This weekend we had planned for Brian and his new friend, Mackenzie, to have a playdate at our house. Unfortunately...snow and a bit of illness with Mackenzie happened and we had to reschedule for next weekend. But in the meantime I have become friendly with Mackenzie's Mom! She gave me permission to reveal their adorable daughter to you! Brian just loves his new friend - they just clicked from that very first day. Mackenzie has some trouble with her eyesight which is why she walks with a stick. But she has no trouble seeing how cute my son is (ha ha!) and Brian and I are clearly smitten with her. We are so excited to have her over to play soon. So I leave you tonight with photos of Brian and his good friend, Mackenzie.

Were you in a bad mood before you looked at these? Then, you're welcome. *smile*

Sunday, January 22, 2012

First Snow...

Yesterday we woke up to silence. The silence that comes with freshly fallen snow. Typically when my ears wake up (they are always ahead of my eyes) I hear traffic. There's a road right next to our house and a constant "vroom vroom" from morning to night. When my ears heard the unfamiliar nothing...it didn't take long before my eyes popped open and my mind (which sometimes stays asleep all day, quite frankly) thought SNOW!

I knew that a certain someone would be so excited...and I was right. As soon as breakfast ended, Brian suited up and went outside with Ed. (Gavin isn't a big fan of the cold or the snow - which is rather convenient for me!)

Brian was a big helper - wanting to learn how to shovel just like his Daddy.

He had so much fun just shuffling around making tracks. It really is the little things.

The other day I reported that Brian tinkled on the potty...which was amazing!! Today I am here to report that, well, he hasn't done it since. He will sit there - but he just doesn't go. I even had him wearing a "Potty Watch" all day. A song plays on the watch in intervals you set up. I set it for every 30 minutes and we would go dancing to the bathroom and sit. And sit. He always ended up going in his diaper. I'm not pressuring or pushing so I know something will "click" for him soon.

Gavin, on the other hand, tinkled AND pooped on the potty yesterday! Before you get super excited...it's me that kind of caught him starting to poop and I placed him on the potty to finish. It will take a lot longer (or so I think...) for Gavin to make the connection. And then we will have to come up with a way that he can communicate to us when he needs the bathroom. But he loves sitting on the potty and was content there yesterday for over five minutes.

He swung his legs and looked around and definitely noticed when he tinkled. I think it took him by surprise.

Know what this is?

This is the new "house" for my current fertility medications! I needed a way to organize them so I'm not rifling through bags to find the right needle and the right med and "crap, where are the band aids??!!?" ... so far it's working out great.

I have three different injectable meds to take twice a day. Soon I will resemble a pin cushion, but you can't complain for something you sign up for, right? We are looking at an egg retrieval at the very start of February. Fingers and toes: commence crossing now!

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